Grand Designs?*

I have been wearing glasses since I was 35 and I’m still not used to them (not the same pair, obviously). I have just bought a new pair. My last ones cost a bomb (don’t they all?). They were ‘designer frames’, though I’m not sure what kind of designer because the lenses kept falling out, a problem that no amount of screwdrivers or superglue would solve. Perhaps the designer was trained to design ejector seats, or those emergency doors on aircraft that fall off on their own. Anyway, isn’t everything designed by a designer of some kind? If it wasn’t, then everything we touched would fall to bits. Okay… irony there, somewhere.

It is possible that the makers expected their glasses to be worn only in TV adverts or optician’s showrooms rather than in the real world. My current glasses are coping well. I have been shifting firewood, hammering blocks of steel, reassembling an aged motorbike and painting the hall (not all at the same time). So far, the lenses have stayed in place.

*A UK Channel4 TV programme with a presenter who knows what he is talking about and isn’t afraid to say what he thinks.

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